When Something Ends And You’re Like ‘Okay, WTH Do I Do Now?’

As scattered as my life might seem to others (“What do you do?” “Oh, well, right now, I edit content for a general interest website; blog for a book website, a sex ed website, and a sex site; pitch freelance articles; work on book stuff; and sometimes teach yoga and meditation), I am actually very methodical when it comes to my career. I generally set a big goal ⇒ break that goal up into smaller steps ⇒ make my slow way toward completing all the steps ⇒ achieve my goal because I’m awesome ⇒ and then flail about because, suddenly, I don’t know what to do with myself.

The flailing sometimes involves binge eating and sometimes involves shopping and sometimes involves both but whatever. This is my process.


After the end of one big project, and after the flailing, there is eventually a new beginning. And so I start all over again.

Life seems all full up on endings lately. Just last week, I went through a second round of book edits with my editor, and she deemed my manuscript ready to move into the production stage. This is a book I have been working on for the past seven or eight years.

I also wrote the last chapter and the conclusion for a ghostwriting project I’d been working on for over a year.

And on a more depressing note, I’ve spent the past few months coming to terms with my cat’s declining health. We have a vet ready to come when we call, to give Kooshie a peaceful, at-home death when the time comes. In the meantime, we’ve slowly taken him off all of his medications, except for the one that seems to keep him comfy.

Despite all of this feeling like a lot, I can’t help but ask myself that question I always ask myself when I finish something big: now what?


While I don’t know what the next big thing will be, I do feel as if I’m reemerging into the world, blinking into the sunlight, feeling the exhilaration in endless possibility. I’m turning an eye toward book promotion, of course, setting up book events and presentations that will all be revealed in good time. I’m planning a new class through The Writers Circle, on the business of freelance writing, which will run in the spring. Over the summer, I’ll be teaching teens a week-long class on writing as advocacy. I’m becoming active again in my local writing community, doing group submissions and participating in open mics. And I should probably start pitching reported pieces again. Planning yoga workshops. Committing to too many things.

Though I don’t generally see January as a time of new beginnings, it’s certainly shaping up to look that way.

So… let’s do this?